This piece had an excellent action part, but it was difficult to understand on the first read. An author that has very well coordinated fight scenes is R. A. Salvatore. you may want to read a bit of his work if you ever need some pointers on how to best write your fights.
The snap ending was pretty intresting. As a rule, I dislike the ‘it was only a dream’ trick ending, but the false snap ending where the monster was the roomate made the second work well.
peas red ober your rigthing bfore submtting so we dontt hab to reed splling errrrors. :)